How To Not Be A Clingy Girlfriend

How Not to be Clingy | yoloabundance.com

Clingy it is being emotionally dependent on another person to make you feel a certain weight. Whether that is love, happiness, positivity or any of the emotions that you want to feel. Attractive, pretty or just making you feel wanted.

Being clingy is kind of gross and sometimes we were very embarrassed about it. So here’s the 10 must Do’s on how to not be clingy, because why do it if you can avoid it?

#1 Recognize that you are clingy and own it

When you're attaching yourself to someone else, needing that person's attention or when you are starting to feel clingy or feel desperate, own it by recognizing it. Because if you don't own it then you're just gonna start spewing these crawlers to get more attention. You're trying to hide behind this mask of not feeling it, and it just all goes out of hand then you don't know when to stop.

#2 Unpack that clinginess

Once you own it and you recognize that you’re actually feeling clingy, you've got unpack it. Understand what is it actually about, what is it that you actually want,  or what is it that you actually don't like.

The way that you can do this is to draw a big line in the middle of a piece of paper. And in one-column write down everything you don't like about this behavior. Write down all the part of you that you don't like what you're feeling.

#3 Write down the exact opposite of what you want

Write down the exact opposite of what you want and understand if you don't do this you're gonna be stuck in the negative. Right now we want to transform the negative ideas to understand what we actually want. Instead of focusing on what you don't want, you gotta realize that on the opposite side of that there's something that you do actually want. 

Telling yourself what you actually want from that will shift you from that negative vibration into that positive vibration or actually allow you to see that there's another flip side of the coin.

#4 Focusing on what you love about this person

If you're clingy towards someone, instead of asking them or manipulating them in order for them to give you more attention, love or any of what you want, start appreciating them for who they are.

Remember the time when you did actually get the feelings that you want to continue to get from that person, you can start creating memories and work with your memories to make them feel good and how it made you feel good. 

What it does is that instead of making that person feel like trapped and being bombarded by this person that's clinging on to them, they start feeling like they are just being appreciated by that  person. It's more attractive for them to be interested and more likely to respond positively to you.

Focus on what you love | yoloabundance.com

#5 Communicate clearly what you want

Most of the time when you are clingy, you find all kinds of ways to manipulate the situation by turning it to your favor so that you can get what you want.

Communicate clearly what you want, owning who you are and also appreciating them.

Identify what are the actual biggest fear that you have and why are you clinging. What is the biggest fear that you're having right now, is it that person's gonna run away? is it that you have something really big that you're dealing with? or what's the biggest fear if you're dealing with it on your own? Look into that because there's a lot of darkness there and instead of looking from outside for emotional support, look inside and see how you can support yourself and be dependent on yourself for emotional support in this situation.

#6 Identify the insecurities 'within you'

Identify what are the biggest fear that you have and why are you clinging. look into those elements because there's a lot of darkness there and instead of looking from outside for emotional support

#7 Explore what’s the worst-case scenario

Explore what's the worst that can actually happen. Say you might think that you will have nobody left in this world who cares about you, which could potentially be true or potentially not be true but your brain comes up with all these worst-case scenarios which is typically normal. Because the brain is designed to think about things in some very irrational ways when it comes to emotions. 

So understanding what your thought pattern is, and what the worst case scenario is, frees you in order for you not you want to impose on desperation on a grasping into outside forces for you to feel good.

#8 Ask questions

Ask questions and then own it . If you are able to communicate open and clearly to that person, then you know it's a much better relationship that you're able to be vulnerable and able to own what you're actually feeling.

#9 Understanding that intimacy is all about openness and communication

Open communication, transparent connection and the ability should be vulnerable and supporting each other through these emotional ups and downs of life. If you are able to do that with the person who you're clinging on to, then they're going to be able to help you with this scenario and this habit of clinging.

Because the best thing is that you can move on from this and grow from it and no longer be a clingster or a clingy person so that you can be really awesome.

#10 Be easy on yourself

Be easy on yourself | yoloabundance.com

Be easy on yourself so that you can actually feel it, also relax into and not reject and deny you're clinging self when it comes. Because it is valid and it is a part of you and there is a way to work with it.

So these are the Ten steps to not being clingy and I hope that you can find out one of those stuff that actually works for you, or you can apply all of the ten stuff and that will be even better and you'll be getting a huge transformation to not be clingy.

#01: How to not 🛑 be CLINGY NOW - 10 MUST DOs, IT WORKS!

How to not be clingy in 10 steps, because why do it if you can avoid it! 🌷

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

YOLO Team - with Hani

After self healing from a 15 year battle with a disease, Hani has distilled the most important learnings into a multi-cultural Bestselling Author of the You Only Live Once book and now, with her team, supports leaders, change makers, and impact driven entrepreneurs to build sustainable career and businesses so that they can contribute at their highest level. She supports holistic transformations through strategy, personal growth and practical spirituality (mindfulness). The YUMMY Team’s clients span USA, Asia, Africa, Europe, and South America. They are sought after by clients and partners like Singapore Management University, Chamber of Commerce’s, Lululemon, HER Global Network, Festivals, talks and private coaching. The YOLO programs have spread across 350+ media outlets including ABC, NBC, FOX, BBC, and Forum of the Future. Prior to coaching, Hani managed global digital marketing teams at Ogilvy & Mather. She also holds a Masters of Science degree in Innovation, is a Master NLP practitioner and has been a part of Stanford and Claremont Mckenna College.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

YOLO Team - with Hani

After self healing from a 15 year battle with a disease, Hani has distilled the most important learnings into a multi-cultural Bestselling Author of the You Only Live Once book and now, with her team, supports leaders, change makers, and impact driven entrepreneurs to build sustainable career and businesses so that they can contribute at their highest level. She supports holistic transformations through strategy, personal growth and practical spirituality (mindfulness). The YUMMY Team’s clients span USA, Asia, Africa, Europe, and South America. They are sought after by clients and partners like Singapore Management University, Chamber of Commerce’s, Lululemon, HER Global Network, Festivals, talks and private coaching. The YOLO programs have spread across 350+ media outlets including ABC, NBC, FOX, BBC, and Forum of the Future. Prior to coaching, Hani managed global digital marketing teams at Ogilvy & Mather. She also holds a Masters of Science degree in Innovation, is a Master NLP practitioner and has been a part of Stanford and Claremont Mckenna College.

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ABOUT YING HAN CHENG

International bestselling author, Speaker And Transformational Life & Business Innovation Coach.

Ying Han Cheng is a multi-cultural Bestselling Author of the YOLO book and founder of YOLO Close the Gap Program.

Growing up internationally and as a third cultured kid, she integrates her multi-cultural and the inter-disciplinary awareness when coaching on topics including Identity and Purpose. With Ying Han's multi-cultural background, wide range of tools, and creative neutro-coaching techniques, she has helped leaders, entrepreneurs and change-makers to reach their highest potential.

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Get notifications on inspiring content, ground breaking mind hacks right to your inbox within ONE CLICK

ABOUT YING HAN CHENG

International bestselling author, Speaker And Transformational Life & Business Innovation Coach.

Ying Han Cheng is a multi-cultural Bestselling Author of the YOLO book and founder of YOLO Close the Gap Program.

Growing up internationally and as a third cultured kid, she integrates her multi-cultural and the inter-disciplinary awareness when coaching on topics including Identity and Purpose. With Ying Han's multi-cultural background, wide range of tools, and creative neutro-coaching techniques, she has helped leaders, entrepreneurs and change-makers to reach their highest potential.

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About the Author

After self healing from a 15 year battle with a disease, Hani has distilled the most important learnings into a multi-cultural Bestselling Author of the You Only Live Once book and now, with her team, supports leaders, change makers, and impact driven entrepreneurs to build sustainable career and businesses so that they can contribute at their highest level. She supports holistic transformations through strategy, personal growth and practical spirituality (mindfulness). The YUMMY Team’s clients span USA, Asia, Africa, Europe, and South America. They are sought after by clients and partners like Singapore Management University, Chamber of Commerce’s, Lululemon, HER Global Network, Festivals, talks and private coaching. The YOLO programs have spread across 350+ media outlets including ABC, NBC, FOX, BBC, and Forum of the Future. Prior to coaching, Hani managed global digital marketing teams at Ogilvy & Mather. She also holds a Masters of Science degree in Innovation, is a Master NLP practitioner and has been a part of Stanford and Claremont Mckenna College.

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